The Day After

The day after is always really hard for me. I have a great day, go to sleep with a smile on my face, and then wake up. And I wake up with absolutely no motivation to go out and experience the new day.

On Friday night, I went to the Paramount in Oakland to see Some Like it Hot. I went with a friend I’d made a few months ago out here, and a few of their college friends. To spare you the details, I had a blast. It was one of the most fun nights I’d had in a long time.

And I woke up this morning, dealt with selling my desk, and didn’t leave the apartment until 9:15 PM. Why not? I’m not entirely sure, but this is a pattern I’ve noticed. Have lots of fun, and then spend the next day looking back, hoping somehow that this expenditure of my emotions will be able to prevent the fleeting sands of yesterday from slipping out of my grasp. As if I could will the past to be bottled up, etched into a record I could replay on a day such as today, when feeling that the future would be best if it were just a re-run of yesterday. Because yesterday was pretty nearly perfect.

I suppose the thing I really want is for day N + 1 to surpass day N, ad infinitum. But that’s obviously not possible. But I would love to have two of these great days in a row. And then try stretching it out to three. Then four. Until, some day, I don’t have to fear that a great day will just lead to a letdown. Some day.